[Update – GPT o1-preview has a go after me at the bottom – see who you prefer.]
I've always wanted to be a poet
Picking words like seashells from the beach
Carving sound and flow
Building Lego thoughts in other's heads

I've always wanted to be a poet
Surrounded by frizzy haired activists
Wearing woven jumpers
Horn-rimmed glasses and pony tails
Jazz-cats and sound-hounds
Waving flags and placards
Don't these people have a job?

I've always wanted to be a poet
But I'm not so keen upon standing on stage
The bright lights dazzling
The attention laser-locked
No room for failure
No room for stuttering
For forgetting how sounds are made by the mouth

I've always wanted to be a poet
Not one of those that writes rhyming verse
Why be restrained by the diktats of the patriarchy?
By the tyranny of convention, the curse
Of needing the words to properly line up and meet the expectations of the listeners

I've always wanted to be a poet
A few hundred words and the job is done
Another coffee watching the crowd
Distilling to a fine sherry
Their tos and fros
Their frowns and smiles
Their fleeting concerns that drift on the wind

I've always wanted to be a poet
Is that a real job anyway?
Do you need family money
Or a patron?
Or to tap a funding spring?
Gushing guilt money
Raining down on a few with luck and talent
The bookish ones that escaped inwardly
Leaving those on the outside
To fend for themselves

I've always wanted to be a poet
I don't know though
Whether I could play the award games
The media promotion
The endless readings to near-empty rooms
Just one rapt listener is a success
But is it, is it really?
Does it pay a mortgage, pay the rent
Pay to heat the house, pay the council tax
Pay for clothes for the kids, and food
And childcare, when you are off
Drinking small glasses of poor promotion wine
With retirees from high paying professions
Or with chunky public sector pensions
That allow them a life of the arts

I've always wanted to be a poet
But I've struggled with timing
With length
What seems right one day, seems horrendous the next
Just write they say,
Then edit later
I don't really know how you do that with verse
Aren't the lines meant to be a set length
A set number of syllables?
My mind is blank
I learnt this in English once
But isn't a poet meant to transgress the boundaries
Fire words out into space to explore
Brave new worlds
Only so long as you are not so different
Stretching, not breaking, expectations
La da di, la da da
Scatting not wrapping
Nature not the contents of your bin
Some form of underlying meaning or point
Not just self-indulgent streams of consciousness running away with themselves across the page

I've always wanted to be a poet
To have my words in a small book
With an artist friend to paint the cover
Bundled by a late minute theme
I've asked an AI to compile
To give the publishers something to sell

I've always wanted to be a poet
How much do they refine their words
Do they fire and forget?
Fire and forgive?
Leave someone else to raise them
To feed and clothe them
To nurture them with love and attention
Or is that the poets job
And does the gender matter
The publishers argue about best placed demographics
Maybe I don't fit
Too rich for some, too poor for others
Not enough deprivation
Not enough lived experience
Sitting here in my armchair
Plucking words from the air
And pinning them into my books

I've always wanted to be a poet
To wear a hat
Maybe that will be my thing
For a bit
Until I get bored
Need to grow
Need a refresh
Stale brands
Sell no content

I've always wanted to be a poet
Would I now
Need to get on
Instagram and TikTok
Film sixty second readings
Pithy little pebbles
Carried in pockets
Like Talismen
Shriveling in the stream
As starved of attention
Next
Swipe up, swipe down
This isn't funny
It's been said before
The person's too
Insert words here

I've always wanted to be a poet
To spend my mornings
Writing 750 words
On a blank sheet of paper
For no other benefit
Than the joy of writing

I've always wanted to be a poet
It takes grit
Dedication
A knowledge of the rules
A degree
A mentor
An apprenticeship
To get to a place of empty silence

Echoes of an Unwritten Poem
I've yearned to sculpt the silence into verse, To harvest words like stones along a stream, And skip them 'cross the surface of the mind. I picture myself among the restless ones, Wild-haired prophets in secondhand coats, Who hurl their voices at the sun — But how do they afford the moon? The spotlight tempts yet turns me cold; Its glare reveals each hidden flaw, My tongue a traitor in my mouth, No script for awkward pauses. Must poetry conform to form, Each line a prisoner to rhyme? Why not let the chaos speak? "Just write, revise when dawn arrives," But every syllable feels final, Carved into the bark of time. Is "poet" just a borrowed dress, Worn by those who can afford The luxury of being heard? I wonder if I'll chase the prizes, Read to rooms of empty chairs, Applauded by indifferent hands. Should I condense my soul to seconds, A fleeting clip to swipe and skip, Lost in endless scrolling seas? Still, I write to hear the echo Of a self I might yet know, To claim a space where words can breathe, And in that breath, become.
[It’s quite good you know!]
Aha, the truth. All of it.
Write something that represents you, before you move on to be someone else.
I think. I will feel differently in a few minutes.